久久婷丁香五月综

Gods? Once again, Yu Xiaoxiao was convinced that Eternal Life Temple was made up of liars and cheats. If gods really existed, where were they when the apocalypse happened? “People believe balderdash like that?” she asked.

Third Young Master Gu considered it before he asked, “Princess, is this ‘balderdash’ you’re talking about another word for ‘nonsense?’”

“Yes,” Yu Xiaoxiao said as she made a clawing motion towards Gu Xinglang’s crotch. “Who has the balls to make up stuff for fun?”

Gu Xinglang glanced down at his crotch and suddenly felt that his balls hurt. That kind of feeling really was…it’d be better if he felt nothing at all.

“Where’s this Eternal Life Temple located?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked. She had to find some time to set fire to the place, or split it with lightning. Anything would do as long as she got rid of those fakes.

Gu Xinglang said, “The summit of Mt. Zhu.”

“Summit?”

“Urk, that’s the mountain peak.”

“Mt. Zhu, like Zhumulangmafeng?”¹

Once again, Third Young Master Gu felt like they were experiencing serious communication problems. “That mountain summit is called Mt. Zhu.”

Yu Xiaoxiao cleared her throat with a hmph. She admitted she’d just acted like a fool, because it was perfectly normal for no Zhumulangmafeng (Mt. Everest) to exist in this world. “Is that place far from us?” she asked.

“It’s located right beyond Wangxiang Pass,” Gu Xinglang replied.

Wangxiang Pass.² Yu Xiaoxiao committed the name to memory.

While the couple were chatting on their way home, Xianzong was facing Junior Master Fenglin with alarm in the imperial study. “Linglong disrespected the Junior Master? Th, this–could there be a misunderstanding somewhere?”

The six monks accompanying Junior Master Fenglin all sneered. Misunderstanding? Looks like this is all the Fengtian sovereign can say.

Junior Master Fenglin didn’t remove his hat or veil in front of Xianzong, but simply said lightly, “Perhaps it was a misunderstanding. Her Royal Highness has quite the set of skills.”

Xianzong felt his vision turn black. Did my daughter beat up the Eternal Life Temple’s Junior Master too?! No way, right? I’m not going to hear that’s the case next, right?!

Junior Master Fenglin said, “This humble monk only just discovered that Princess Linglong thinks lightly of our Eternal Life Temple.”

“It must be a misunderstanding,” Xianzong sat up straight, his tone resolute. “Linglong is just like her mother, pious and devout.”

“Your Maj–” a monk wanted to tell him what Princess Linglong had done, but Junior Master Fenglin interrupted him.

“You cannot be rude,” he said.

The monk in question lowered his head, not daring to speak again.

Xianzong said, “Junior Master just said that Linglong injured a few Zhuri merchants?”

“They could be considered as working for our Eternal Life Temple,” Junior Master Fenglin said while staring at Xianzong.

Xianzong wanted to cry. Ever since his daughter had gotten married, he couldn’t recognize her anymore. It had only been a few days! Yet she’d beaten up everyone from Zhao Qiuming to the Zhuri men working for Eternal Life Temple. Would she end up fighting her way to the temple itself atop Mt. Zhu one day?

(Author: Your Majesty, you’ve stumbled upon the truth.)

“However, it wasn’t convenient for this humble monk to ask after those men’s welfare,” Junior Master Fenglin continued. “After all, they were the ones at fault.”

Hearing this revived Xianzong’s spirits. As long as he wasn’t responsible, then things were fine. If the victims didn’t come looking for him, then his daughter could beat up whoever she liked. If possible, she could even thrash Gu Xinglang to death since right now Zhao Beicheng looked rather pleasing to his eye.

Seeing the myriad of expressions pass through Xianzong’s face left Junior Master Fenglin and the other six monks speechless. Just by observing the emperor, it was obvious to see why Fengtian was always being bullied by other countries.

“Linglong is still young,” Xianzong said, suddenly in a good mood at the thought of Zhao Beicheng being his potential new son-in-law. He smiled at Junior Master Fenglin and added, “Junior Master shouldn’t sink to her level. Zhen will definitely discipline her well.”

Junior Master Fenglin only nodded. These were nothing but perfunctory words, so he didn’t have to believe them.

Xianzong said, “I don’t know whether Junior Master has any business in my Fengtian?”

Junior Master Fenglin said, “This humble monk is following my master’s orders to descend the mountain and travel about. May Your Majesty mete punishment for my uninvited visit.”

Xianzong might be a self-indulgent, fatuous ruler, but he was no idiot. Traveling by coincidence to Fengtian? That stuff’s only good for tricking ghosts. It had been too many years since anyone from Eternal Life Temple, Cheng Guan excepted, had come to Fengtian.

While Xianzong and Junior Master Fenglin continued to exchange civilities, Jing Mo at Complacent Winery had already seen the five Zhuri merchants with broken legs. The capital city’s Governor Zhang was very nervous, but still gave a clear account of everything that had happened.

Jing Mo remained silent for a long time after he was done.

His Excellency Zhang was already preparing himself for the moment Jing Mo ordered men to drag him out, so said roguishly, “Eldest imperial prince, the fault in this matter does not lay with us Fengtian.”

Jing Mo didn’t care who was right or wrong and asked, “You said Princess Linglong planted them in the ground. What does that mean?” Was “planting” just Fengtian slang for “breaking their legs?”

His Excellency Zhang mimed transplanting rice shoots with his arms to demonstrate. “Just like this.”

Jing Mo could imagine it in his head, but had trouble accepting it as reality.

His Excellency Zhang added, “Eldest imperial prince, your views on this matter?”

“Someone come, escort His Excellency Zhang out,” Jing Mo ordered.

“This official takes my leave,” His Excellency Zhang didn’t waste any more words, but left after paying respects. He hadn’t been beaten or cursed, which made him feel supremely lucky today. As for the five Zhuri merchants, well–what did it matter to him what happened to them?

Once he was gone, the subordinate on Jing Mo’s right asked, “Master, these five men?”

“They made fools of themselves,” Jing Mo said. “Find them doctors for treatment. If they can’t be cured, just have them fend for themselves.”

His Excellency Zhang had cleverly omitted the fact that the five unlucky bastards had been working for Eternal Life Temple. Suppose the eldest imperial prince made him fing Junior Master Fenglin with the merchants in tow? Being scared once was bad enough, but twice would give him mental problems!

Princess Linglong, Jing Mo calculated mentally. Perhaps I should see her one more time before leaving Fengtian so we can lay all our cards on the table.

In the carriage, Yu Xiaoxiao sneezed.

“Cold?” Gu Xinglang asked quickly.

Yu Xiaoxiao felt that her body was strong enough to run in a circle in the Arctic right now, so how could she have caught a chill? Ah, does the Arctic exist in this world?

While she was daydreaming, Third Young Master Gu touched his wife’s hand and asked, “Do you feel cold? Should I close the windows?”

“Is there an Arctic in this world?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked.

What’s that? Gu Xinglang shook his head. “What is ‘Arctic?’”

“Heheh,” Yu Xiaoxiao just chuckled.

Forget it, Gu Xinglang rested a hand against his forehead. Just pretend I never asked.

“I’m not cold,” Yu Xiaoxiao said. “There’s probably someone thinking of me.”

“Ah?” Gu Xinglang’s fingers on Yu Xiaoxiao’s hand stiffened. How was he supposed to reply to that?

Yu Xiaoxiao grasped his hand and said, “I wonder who it could be?” Yep, I saw my adjunct drillmaster bestie flirt just like this with her lover. Yu Xiaoxiao’s eyes widened expectantly as she waited for Gu Xinglang to return her affections.